Now before you get all excited, don’t know if Nearly Naked Fireworks is going to be open this year. But, several years back, the company in Puyallup, WA set up shop based on the business model of local bikini-clad coffee shops. Apparently attractive women decked out in very little sure sell a lot of fireworks – it seems the amount of clothing and the amount of fireworks are an inverse relationship. The fewer clothes, the more sales!
Our undercover reporters on the scene described one bikini baring lady’s job was to hold a “fireworks” sign out on the street while other barely dressed employees waited on customers inside the tent. A sign was hung up to relieve incoming gawkers guilty consciences -- "Don't be afraid to stare. ... That's what there here for (sic)." Of course, people complained about the business, saying it’s tacky, tasteless and downright immoral. One thing it’s not is illegal. It’s against the law to be completely nude, but a bathing suit (no matter how tiny) is perfectly legit.
If you can’t get out to Puyallup, we can help you out. While we can’t promise to slip into our skivvies, we can let you shop a wide selection of fireworks at AllSpark Fireworks any time of the day or night. Well ship out your purchase to arrive right on your doorstep, but we can’t promise what the UPS delivery guy will be wearing!